So, I started this website and blog just under two weeks ago and since then I have been so blessed with words of amazing encouragement from friends and family. Three times it happened today. Three times. I walked on air after each one. You know who you are.
Every time, it has been noticed, remembered and appreciated. Every time it fills me up.
At the same time, I realize now, that each day I have also thought some version of this.
Aw, only X people commented.
I bet either:
A) Everyone else thinks I suck.
B) Nobody else even notices.
Um, excuse me, self? Did you start this whole thing called joY so that you could get everyone to stroke your ego and tell you how much they appreciate what you say and how much they want to do Yoga with you?
Did you start this whole thing because it gives you joY to be in this "wellness world," and every time you write a post and every time you teach or do Yoga you feel more like the person you want to be?
The answer is - the last one.
It's really hard though, not to get caught up in the need for feedback from others and have your own thoughts about yourself so contingent on what everyone else thinks. It's hard, but you just have to believe in what you do and love what you do and just genuinely DO what you do and yes - you will want it to impact others, but you can't wait on them in order to feel satisfaction. Everyone wants to make a difference, BUT the truth is . . .
Just because they aren't telling you that you make a difference, doesn't mean you don't. Remember that.
Also remember what a wise person told me, even though I don't want to believe it. She said:
If you accept it as absolute truth every time someone tells you how wonderful you make them feel, then you will have to accept it as absolute truth every time someone tells you how awful you make them feel too.
I don't believe that.
Could it be true?
Could it be that you don't MAKE anyone feel a certain way? You bring something to what they already have and TOGETHER, something is created.
It's not just you.
It's not just them.
Just trust. Trust in yourself and trust in others to pick up what you're puttin' down (quote from Valerie Formicola), even if they never really tell you that they picked it up, but don't count on it to define who you are or how you're doin.'
Who you are and how you're doin' is YOUR decision.